Rereading My Childhood – A Year With the BSC #51: Shaving a Doll

A Year With the BSC is an informal series wherein I explore the 1990’s CD-ROM video game The Baby-sitters Club Friendship Kit. The game is more of a personal organizer; it features with a calendar, an address book, a stationary kit, a flyer maker, and a personality profile. I’m focusing on the more interesting aspect of the game: the personalized letters and the journal entries. The full list of entries can be found at rereadingmychildhood.com.

Previously On A Year With the BSC #50: Self Promotion

We’re in the homestretch, stick with me, people! And this week is easy, as Mallory is the only one who wrote this week.

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That’s what every little girl wants – a Rip Van Winkle Doll. No. They don’t want to cut Barbie’s hair. They want to do a job for a man. A job that a man is perfectly capable of doing his-own-damn-self.

Although to answer Mallory’s question, the craziest toy I’ve seen is that weird “Elsa Is Pregnant” app I saw advertised on other unscrupulous apps. What do you do in those games? Deliver the baby? Look at a growing Elsa? Who would buy this game? Honestly, people paid for a barely working bird app. I’m no better. I give money to a fake butler who is helping spruce up his parents’ infinite-room mansion.

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Rereading My Childhood – A Year With the BSC #50: Self Promotion

A Year With the BSC is an informal series wherein I explore the 1990’s CD-ROM video game The Baby-sitters Club Friendship Kit. The game is more of a personal organizer; it features with a calendar, an address book, a stationary kit, a flyer maker, and a personality profile. I’m focusing on the more interesting aspect of the game: the personalized letters and the journal entries. The full list of entries can be found at rereadingmychildhood.com.

Previously On A Year With the BSC #49: Neither a Simone Nor a Biles Be

Just a few more weeks before we’ve come full circle and it’s been quite the journey! For right now, let’s focus on our favorite babysitters.

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Maybe you should focus more on your school work than on your Kid Kit. Let’s just move on from that.

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Well, if you can’t find it, you’re in luck, my equinophiliac friend! I have a couple posts about Goosebumps! May I recommend my review of Goosebumps classic Night of the Living Dummy?

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I don’t have a father anymore. Can I go bowling?

Next Time On A Year With the BSC #51: Shaving a Doll

Rereading My Childhood – A Year With the BSC #49: Neither a Simone Nor a Biles Be

A Year With the BSC is an informal series wherein I explore the 1990’s CD-ROM video game The Baby-sitters Club Friendship Kit. The game is more of a personal organizer; it features with a calendar, an address book, a stationary kit, a flyer maker, and a personality profile. I’m focusing on the more interesting aspect of the game: the personalized letters and the journal entries. The full list of entries can be found at rereadingmychildhood.com.

Previously On A Year With the BSC #48: Turn On the TV

It’s the home stretch of this series, people! This started at the end of June 2018 and we’ve finally come to the beginning of June 2019. Let’s see what the BSC is up to now.

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Did they, Kristy? Are you sure they didn’t just say that so that you’ll shut up? Because that sounds like something I’d do. “Let’s just play her stupid game so she’ll go away and we can watch TV later.”

Also, I don’t think soap operas are appropriate activities for children. Sleeping with the next door neighbor and getting pregnant while giving him an STD doesn’t sound like something 8-year-olds should pretend.

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I think it just rained here, so I had a good day.

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That’s really random. The chances of someone playing this game doing well in gymnastics is infinitesimal as to be negligible. Also, the people who would be good at gymnastics would not be playing this game. Sorry.

Additionally, I doubt the Arnold twins are Olympic gold medalists. For one, you have to be 16 to compete in the Olympics and, secondly, neither of the Arnold twins is named Simone. You’re fine, Kristy. They only reason they can do a flip now is that they’re so low to the ground. They’re kids. You can’t let kids push you around. You push them around. You force them to pretend-murder each other for insurance money.

Next Time On A Year With the BSC #50: Self-Promotion

Rereading My Childhood – A Year With the BSC #48: Turn On the TV

A Year With the BSC is an informal series wherein I explore the 1990’s CD-ROM video game The Baby-sitters Club Friendship Kit. The game is more of a personal organizer; it features with a calendar, an address book, a stationary kit, a flyer maker, and a personality profile. I’m focusing on the more interesting aspect of the game: the personalized letters and the journal entries. The full list of entries can be found at rereadingmychildhood.com.

Previously On A Year With the BSC #47: The Long Game

Looks like Mary Anne has some complaining to do!

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Okay, if you force them into games, they’ll just resent you and hate the games more. If they want to watch tv, just let them watch tv. Jessi weighs in on this issue.

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Well, not everyone wants to dance all the time, Jessi, that’s not better.

Look, I was a part of that generation that watched too much TV and I remember news reports about how much TV kids are watching. My school even had a “Turn Off the TV Week” at my school and it was heavily promoted. (I thought it was mandatory and I went to my teacher, in tears, about how I didn’t want to miss my shows. My teacher told me I didn’t have to participate. Thank you, Ms. Sawyer, because it was “The Dark Phoenix Saga” on X-Men: The Animated Series, and anyone who knows anything knows the importance of Jean Grey’s relationship with the M’Kraan Crystal.) The only thing watching too much TV has done is that I can play along to TV theme song games on YouTube and do a pretty good job.

The new issue is if kids watch too much YouTube or play on their phones too much. The only difference is that I never had access to creepy pornography or bullshit flat earth videos while watching Fox Kids at four in the afternoon. I did have to learn the difference between TV and reality like everyone else. My father pointing to the TV and saying, “TV,” and then waving his arms around him and saying, “Reality,” is still etched into my brain like the theme song to Duck Tails. So, really, the issue is figuring out a way to teach kids the difference between the things they see on a computer screen and the things they see in real life.

And we need to just get rid of Flat Earthers. I say send them all the Antarctic to find that stupid wall they keep talking about with no internet access and don’t let them back until they figure out they’re idiots or they find their stupid wall. And take the border wall with you!

Next Time on A Year With the BSC #49: Neither a Simone Nor a Biles Be

Rereading My Childhood – A Year With the BSC #47: The Long Game

A Year With the BSC is an informal series wherein I explore the 1990’s CD-ROM video game The Baby-sitters Club Friendship Kit. The game is more of a personal organizer; it features with a calendar, an address book, a stationary kit, a flyer maker, and a personality profile. I’m focusing on the more interesting aspect of the game: the personalized letters and the journal entries. The full list of entries can be found at rereadingmychildhood.com.

Previously On A Year With the BSC #46: This One’s Weird

The BSC is back and they are writing a lot! Good timing, since I have this week off from school. Next week, it’s summer classes, but let’s not worry about that right now and try to rest after a very annoying semester. (I was on a good streak, it was time for a semester to be a clunker.)

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That’s a little harsh, Jessi, he’s trying his best.

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Claudia! You misspelled your friend’s name! You should spend your time learning to spell her damn name rather than making a poster for someone who recovered from an illness usually relegated to five-year-olds. You need to get your priorities in order, Claud. Also, I feel like Abby can ask Kristy herself.

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Gosh, Kristy, if you don’t want Abby at your game, just say so. No need to be so shady.

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Geez, Abby. I know you’re angling for VP, but the brown nosing is just embarrassing when it involves puns.

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Looks like Kristy fell for it, although I can’t imagine Kristy is dumb enough to fall for Abby’s machinations. Maybe Kristy is playing the long game. She’s planning to get Abby comfortable so she can use her athletic abilities, but sometimes the ire seeps out, like in that shady post from before. Kristy is still human after all.

Next Time On A Year With the BSC #48: Turn On the TV

Rereading My Childhood – A Year With the BSC #46: This One’s Weird

A Year With the BSC is an informal series wherein I explore the 1990’s CD-ROM video game The Baby-sitters Club Friendship Kit. The game is more of a personal organizer; it features with a calendar, an address book, a stationary kit, a flyer maker, and a personality profile. I’m focusing on the more interesting aspect of the game: the personalized letters and the journal entries. The full list of entries can be found at rereadingmychildhood.com.

Previously On A Year with the BSC #45: Claudia’s Ruse

I don’t know what to say. Um, well, there were no new BSC entries for this week. Yeah. Seriously. Every week, there has been at least one entry into the BSC Notebook, but this week – nada.

I’m grateful, don’t get me wrong. I have finals this week and I would like that time to study. I appreciate it. So, I guess I’ll see you next week! Unless there’s something wrong with the emulator I’m using. That’s always a possibility.

Next Time On A Year With the BSC #47: The Long Game

Rereading My Childhood – A Year With the BSC #45: Claudia’s Ruse

A Year With the BSC is an informal series wherein I explore the 1990’s CD-ROM video game The Baby-sitters Club Friendship Kit. The game is more of a personal organizer; it features with a calendar, an address book, a stationary kit, a flyer maker, and a personality profile. I’m focusing on the more interesting aspect of the game: the personalized letters and the journal entries. The full list of entries can be found at rereadingmychildhood.com.

Previously on A Year With the BSC #44: Vaccinate Your Damn Kids

So the BSC was awfully chatty this week, so let’s get to it. First of all, Dawn sent me a letter.

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Fun fact: Stacey has not sent me one letter. She must think I’m too snarky. And speaking of snark…

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Mal, buddy, boobalah, don’t say, “a swinging time was had by all!” Not when talking about kids.

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What? After five home runs, they still didn’t win? Who were they playing against? The Monstars from Space Jam?

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Cool, Mary Anne, but they still lost and bravery has nothing to do with winning, which is what we care about as Capitalist Americans.

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What 11-year-old doesn’t love O Henry! Yeah, fuck Frozen, I want stories about old-timey couples in abject poverty selling their prized possessions or body parts so they can buy a gift.

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Gawd, Claudia, you can’t even spell your beloved dead grandmother’s name? It’s “Mimi.” That’s it. You only have to remember two letters and then double it! Now I think she’s just fucking with us. She wants to lower expectations so she doesn’t have to try. That’s the only explanation. This is all a giant ruse. It has to be.

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Oh good, those coupons that kids never fulfill.

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Just stacks and stacks of useless paper. Geez, kids, just clean your stupid room without your parents asking one time and you’ll be set for the fucking year. Pro-tip from a previous child.

Next Time On A Year With the BSC #46: This One’s Weird

Rereading My Childhood – A Year With the BSC #44: Vaccinate Your Damn Kids

A Year With the BSC is an informal series wherein I explore the 1990’s CD-ROM video game The Baby-sitters Club Friendship Kit. The game is more of a personal organizer; it features with a calendar, an address book, a stationary kit, a flyer maker, and a personality profile. I’m focusing on the more interesting aspect of the game: the personalized letters and the journal entries. The full list of entries can be found at rereadingmychildhood.com.

Previously On A Year With the BSC #43: Swing and a Miss

A lot to unpack this week. Stoneybrook is abuzz with Special Olympics fever, while the Marshalls have a different kind of fever. But first, Mary Anne has a nice thing to say.

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Aww, that’s really sweet, Mary Anne. It’s time for some controversy that shouldn’t be a controversy!

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If Abby’s parents had just given her the chicken pox vaccine like they do now, she could have taken that job. When I was a kid, we all got chicken pox from our best-friend after a sleepover then we all missed our Kindergarten Graduation. When I heard about a Chicken Pox Vaccination, I thought, “Hey, kids should miss important milestones in their lives.” Then I grew the fuck up and realized that it’s really pointless to suffer an illness that can be eradicated by a simple shot. This is all to say, clearly and loudly for the people in the back – vaccinate your damn children! We need to maintain herd immunity for the people with compromised immune systems who can’t get vaccinated. Don’t be a jerk.

On a side note – kickboxing?

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I love how the game advertises activities that come with the game.

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Oh no, Stacey! If you don’t watch the Special Olympics, you’ll be forced out of Stoneybrook! Again! We’re a community and we can’t have a weak link New Yorker mucking up the Special Olympics.

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Oh my god! See? Abby has gone down! See what happens when you don’t vaccinate your stupid, ugly kids? Only vaccinated kids are beautiful and smart – it’s true, don’t @ me.

Next Time On A Year With the BSC #45: Claudia’s Ruse

Rereading My Childhood – A Year With the BSC #43: Swing and a Miss

A Year With the BSC is an informal series wherein I explore the 1990’s CD-ROM video game The Baby-sitters Club Friendship Kit. The game is more of a personal organizer; it features with a calendar, an address book, a stationary kit, a flyer maker, and a personality profile. I’m focusing on the more interesting aspect of the game: the personalized letters and the journal entries. The full list of entries can be found at rereadingmychildhood.com.

Previously On A Year With the BSC #42: Steez Chomping

Once again we have a time problem with this game. Since the ’90s, the term “swinger” has taken on a different connotation. We’ll get to that.

First of all, this week was my birthday and I was pleasantly surprised when I logged into the game this week. On the bed was a small blue rectangle. When I clicked on it, the BSC yelled, “Surprise!” and I got this pixelated treat:

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It’s like when you die and go down a long tunnel with your family smiling at you from the end. They’re all there. Staring at me. While I read their card. Complete with a trademark symbol on their logo.

Anyway, the Special Olympics are underway in Stoneybrook, despite Betsy DeVos’s sabotage. They triumphed, like the kids at the end of Breakin’ 2: Electric Boogaloo. They raised enough money to save the youth center, despite what the ’80s style villainry (which is mired in building codes and the need for a brand new mall).

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I don’t know if the team should call themselves the “Stoneybrook Swingers.” It might attract a bad crowd. One with hot tubs, leopard print, and early, regretful marriages. I don’t care what two or more consenting adults do in their free time, but a Special Olympics softball game is not the place to ask twenty-somethings to dance and remark that “they look tense and should relax and a few drinks.”

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I don’t know why we need cheerleaders, but fine. If the kids want to support the team in a very outward and loud manner, then I guess this is fine. It’s fine. It’s a little unnecessary, but it’s fine.

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If you didn’t think that Mary Anne narrated this letter ver-ba-tim, you were wrong. Does she literally say, “Love, Dawn. Mary Anne”? She literally does.

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Yeah, sort of. Unless the “Pitcher, left-fielders, you’ll all fall down” line is about the Swingers. Ugh. Just typing that sentence makes me think of creepy couples who live in hotel rooms. Look, if you want to do that, that’s great and I’m happy you’re living life to the fullest. Just don’t hit on people who aren’t in that lifestyle. Don’t y’all have a chatroom or something to meet each other? Like, I don’t know, Swingtown. or Swingnation, or Hot Tub Summer in the City, or something?

Next Time On A Year With the BSC #44: Vaccinate Your Damn Kids

Rereading My Childhood – A Year With the BSC #42: Steez Chomping

A Year With the BSC is an informal series wherein I explore the 1990’s CD-ROM video game The Baby-sitters Club Friendship Kit. The game is more of a personal organizer; it features with a calendar, an address book, a stationary kit, a flyer maker, and a personality profile. I’m focusing on the more interesting aspect of the game: the personalized letters and the journal entries. The full list of entries can be found at rereadingmychildhood.com.

Previously On A Year With the BSC #41: A Lot to Unpack

After last week’s problematic wording, let’s see how they address the Special Olympics this week.

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Worried someone is chomping on your steez, Kristy? You worried someone’s going to steez chomping all over the original great idea? Worried about some competish?

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Oh my god! There are only 24 hours in the day, Abby!

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That’s the most sensible thing I’ve read. I was seriously worried that they would also take this on. They already lead congested lives for thirteen-year-olds, there’s no need to add more.

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You know, Claudia, you can flip back a few pages and the words “Special Olympics” are written right there. You know that, right? Claudia, I say these things because I’m worried about you.

Next Time On A Year With the BSC #43: Swing and a Miss